here’s where i’m at:
it’s the 40th day of the year but somehow feels like the 1 millionth day of the year? trump’s 2nd impeachment trial starts today! i hope he goes to jail :) i also was really loving not hearing about him everyday, but alas. i am patiently (read: obsessively updating deuxmoi) waiting for the big armie hammer news to drop and also the 2nd episode of the test kitchen podcast. also the next episode of wandavision. other things i am waiting to watch: search party, the britney doc, promising young woman.
it’s funny 2 me how the day before the Big Sports Game where grown men run around in tights and smash each other to the ground, the internet was atizzy about a grown woman smashing a guitar at the end of her rock music performance. also funny how they still allow people to have gender reveal parties even though they are clearly dangerous? also ALSO funny that the very tall building for very rich people is actually hell. who could have predicted!?
other business:
over the past few weeks i’ve been asking instagram what to write about, for some newsletter inspo, and a lot of suggestions were about parenting in a panny (my cute lil nickname for pandemic) and also what the vibe has been like, being in costa rica. SO! here i go.
now this may come as a shock, but the truth is i don’t know what the fuck i’m doing, parenting wise. does anyone? i’m just trying to get through it without causing too much damage to my poor kids and hubs! this year has been such a shit show for everybody, but for people with kids? yuck. especially mothers! infinity yuck.
me? when i am feeling really overwhelmed or like i’m an island (which happens a lot), sometimes i’ll reach out to another parent to do a check in (or call my mum), or even post something on instagram that i know the other parents who follow me will see, like a bat signal. it makes me feel less alone - it might sound silly but i honestly do not know what i would have done without that outlet. i hope it makes other parents feel less alone too! you gotta do what you gotta do.
and like, yes, the being together all the live long day and really bonding IS a huge bonus! getting to witness all the milestones i would have missed otherwise, just really getting to KNOW each other and figuring out what’s important to us as a family. all that is massive & i love it, will treasure these memories forever, yadda yadda. the being in costa rica and not locked down in our house also helps, i definitely can’t deny that, but it also turns out that being someplace warm doesn’t really make young kids any less annoying :) they’re just sandier and sweatier! have you ever tried washing a mountain of sand off a sweaty, screamy, wiggly toddler’s head when there’s also sunscreen involved? it’s like cement. it’s impossible.
ALL THAT SAID, when i’m in a parenting rut, or something new and weird happens, or i just need a gut check/pep talk, my urge is to look for resources, so i feel productive instead of just wallowing in my helplessness. the other day i just straight up googled “are my kids making me depressed?” (the answer i gleaned was probably no? but also maybe not no?). i recently found this doctor on instagram who has a ton of very practical tips, in case you are also struggs to func. i particularly appreciated her tips on how to handle a meltdown when your other kid is also screaming at you - this happens to me…..every day…and in the end i’m usually the one who ends up having a tantrum.
so, the moral of the story is: parenting in a pandemic? wouldn’t recommend it! 0/10. no stars. NEXT!
costa rica wise, here is an interesting fact about where i’m living: it’s one of the world’s 5 blue zones. a blue zone is a place where the healthiest people live/where people live the longest. this area has the world’s lowest rate of middle age mortality, which is pretty cool. apparently, this can be tied to very strong communities & social networks, and lots of regular low-intensity exercise. also, everyone here is infinity more relaxed than any other person i’ve ever met. pura vida is the national motto which basically means hakuna matata. i am trying my best to lean into this lifestyle. is it working? only time will tell.
it’s a very big difference from toronto panny life, which had me wound up so tight i was poopin’ diamonds. and don’t get me wrong, i’m still full of worries - a few months on the beach probably isn’t going to undo a lifetime of anxiety - BUT, the general chill vibe AND lack of imminent covid threat in our faces at ALL TIMES is allowing us to slightly unclench as a family, which is a real gift that we do NOT take for granted. of course, we still mask up and sanitize and keep our distance and all the regular rules, but there was only 1 new case in our municipality today. so it feels infinity less scary to be here. for those reasons, and because our flights home were cancelled, we decided to extend our trip rather than rush back to canada. also the air canada lady on the phone said i should stay, too.
and so that’s that on that!
as always, thanks for reading. stay safe, stay excellent.
xoxo
kt